Opera For People Who Don’t Like It
It has come to my attention that there are people who don’t like opera. My opinion is that we all have a right to dislike whatever we feel like disliking because we have free will, opposable thumbs and...
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In my last post, I talked about prostitutes, psychos and tuberculosis. In this one, I will discuss various violent means by which operatic characters meet their ends. Some of these would make the ID...
View ArticleYet More Opera for People Who Don’t Like It
Female Opera Singers and Other Wild Animals Most people think female opera singers look like this: Some of us look more like this: Most of us are somewhere in between: We’ve all heard the saying, “The...
View ArticleAnd Yet More Opera for People Who Don’t Like It
The Men (i.e. Tenors, Baritones and Basses) Male opera singers are just as crazy as the females, and just as likely to flay you alive if you get them mad, especially at performance time. Add to this an...
View ArticleOpera for People Who Don’t Like It
The Stories Opera is more than just middle-aged fat people in period costumes making funny sounds. An opera is a play, with a plot. The only differences between operas and spoken plays are: (1) operas...
View ArticleOpera for People Who Don’t Like It
Those Crazy Germans In my last lesson, I mentioned opera plots and how they are reminiscent of lurid cable TV channels that specialize in re-enacted crimes. As an example, I gave the plot of Verdi’s...
View ArticleOpera for People Who Don’t Like It
DEATH, OPERATIC STYLE In most operas, somebody dies. Usually it’s the hero or the heroine, or both of them. Occasionally, someone else will get in on the act, too, not wanting to be left out of all the...
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THE FRENCH AND THE RUSSIANS Once everybody else saw that the Italians had come up with a Good Thing, other countries wanted to get in on it. I already covered the Germans in an earlier lesson, so I...
View ArticleOpera for People Who Don’t Like It
The So-Called Life of an Opera Singer Life upon the wicked stage ain’t nothin’ for a girl. Ellie in Jerome Kern’s and Oscar Hammerstein II’s musical Show Boat* People outside “The Business” are...
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Auditions If you think job interviews are the liver and Brussels sprouts on the dinner plate of life, try doing an audition sometime. An audition makes a job interview look like a triple-dip double...
View ArticleOpera For People Who Don’t Like It
There was a time in the history of opera when singers ruled. If you had a great voice, it wouldn’t matter if you looked like a gorilla. You were in. Stage directors would never dare to ask you to do...
View ArticleOpera for People Who Don’t Like It
Tenors Yes, tenors get their own chapter. You’ll see why. Tenors and sopranos are natural enemies, passionate lovers or both. Whatever the state of the relationship, it is never dull. Tenors are the...
View ArticleOpera for People Who Don’t Like It
This is going to be long. There is just too much here to laugh at: Sopranos and Mezzo-Sopranos I used to have a wonderful vocal coach who, when she heard me say something that she thought was dumb...
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Baritones and Basses Baritones are the sex gods of the opera world.* A baritone voice and hot looks seem to go together. The irony is that baritones, the hottest guys on the opera stage, are usually...
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Conductor, noun (kǝn dǝk tǝr): A musician who plays no instrument, yet always gets top billing. Train Wreck, noun (trān rek): In ensemble music, the condition that results when one of the players or...
View ArticleOpera for People Who Don’t Like It
Stage Directors The average opera has several principal singers, a few comprimario singers (opera speak for bit players), a chorus and sometimes dancers. Some supernumeraries might also be hired to...
View ArticleOpera For People Who Don’t Like It
It has come to my attention that there are people who don’t like opera. My opinion is that we all have a right to dislike whatever we feel like disliking because we have free will, […]
View ArticleMore Opera for People Who Don’t Like It
In my last post, I talked about prostitutes, psychos and tuberculosis. In this one, I will discuss various violent means by which operatic characters meet their ends. Some of these would make the ID...
View ArticleYet More Opera for People Who Don’t Like It
Female Opera Singers and Other Wild Animals Most people think female opera singers look like this: Some of us look more like this: Most of us are somewhere in between: We’ve all heard the saying, […]
View ArticleAnd Yet More Opera for People Who Don’t Like It
The Men (i.e. Tenors, Baritones and Basses) Male opera singers are just as crazy as the females, and just as likely to flay you alive if you get them mad, especially at performance time. Add […]
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